At the beginning of December, BFF and I decided to try something new…you see Phoenix Comicon had started doing a FanFest last December and our inner geeks were dying to go and get our geek on so we went. I would say this was like Comicon Lite….a smaller version of the main event in June but with a smaller venue, fewer guests and such. It is even held at a completely different place than the main one. We were pretty stoked though, as December means BBC isn’t filming and so this means a lot of BBC stars were going to be at FanFest. We were most excited about two in particular: for BFF it was Gareth David-Lloyd (Ianto from Torchwood) and for myself it was Karen Gillian (Amy Pond from Doctor Who). So, reservations were made, photo ops purchased and the planning began. You all know how BFF and I hate to people but really we hate to people in large crowds and any type of event like this was sure to bring people and not just any people…Comicon people. Let’s be honest….you have read before about the strange people we meet at Comicon and this was no exception. One such incident really stressed why BFF and I do not like to people in this case.
Since this was a smaller event, the main panels were in a largish room, but not as huge as the ballrooms at the convention center. We discovered that this meant not as many people in the panels and you could basically get pretty close to the front without having to wait through the entire day, which I must admit was kind of nice. We had decided to go to a film screening the first day that Gareth David-Lloyd was starring in and hosting the panel afterwards. We had arrived early during another panel (per usual and before we realized we probably didn’t have to do so) and moved up when that panel was over to the 3rd row to get a get view of the screen and of course Gareth himself during the panel. You have to understand something here…BFF is obsessed with Ianto Jones. About as much as she is obsessed with Barrowman. Like legit obsessed. I was afraid she would lick him or something during our photo op but luckily she contained herself and just squealed and jumped up and down afterwards (it was pretty adorable). So there we were, minding our own business, waiting the 30 minutes before the film screening to start when the incident happened.
BFF was crocheting Stormtroopers to give to her family for Christmas and I was messing around on Facebook and Snapchat (follow me there for funny stuff ——> ladymiryaa). No really, BFF was crocheting Stormtroopers. Except for they didn’t have arms so they looked….well….like a penis. No joke, BFF turned to me and asked me what it looked like and without hesitation, I answered “A Dicktrooper”….hence they became known as Dicktroopers till they got their arms attached. No joke. Judge for yourself.
Like I said, we were minding our own business, when a lady came up and asked if the seats next to us were taken. We were the only ones in the entire row. Do we look like we have that many friends? Nope. Seats aren’t taken. Much to BFF’s chagrin, Strange Lady sits right NEXT to her…no comfort chair between them…and let’s just say she is not a small lady. She practically sat ON BFF. I looked around to see if there were other seats this Strange Lady could have taken…pretty sure most of the room was empty. Unfortunately for BFF, this Strange Lady was a talker. Like a she won’t shut up no matter how much you ignore her or have RBF talker. I actually leaned over to BFF at one point and asked her if she wanted to switch seats but she said no. She should have taken me up on it. BFF has since stated that she is the Wife of the Mayor of Poopsville (remember him??) and I believe her. Poor BFF. She was forced to make small talk with the Wife of the Mayor of Poopsville even though she didn’t want to people right then. At all. She was soon spared more chitter chatter when the film started and she shut the fuck up.
After the film was over, Gareth David-Lloyd and the guys who made the film held a panel where people could ask questions and they could talk about the film. It was awesome. So if you ever get a chance to see the movie I Am Alone, do it. You won’t regret it. let me tell you something about BFF and I when it comes to panels at a Comicon event. There is NO WAY IN HELL we are going to get up and ask as question. Ummm…nope. Hard pass. We just enjoy listening to the questions others as and the answers the panelists give. Our introvertness would never allow us to get up and do something like that in public. So we sat, listened and endured the Wife of the Mayor of Poopsville, who by the way, had finally moved over enough to where she was not sitting on top of BFF. The panel ended and the moderator told all those that had asked a question to come up and see him (remember way smaller group of people). We packed up our stuff quickly and tried to get the hell away from the Wife of the Mayor of Poopsville. As we were walking out, we heard her say “Nurse? Oh Nurse? Excuse me Nurse?” (at some point BFF had said she was a nurse to her) and I think we both groaned out loud. We turned around to see her frantically trying to catch up with us and as she did she asked us the most bizarre question. The conversation went something like this:
WotMP: “When you go up to get your prize for asking a question, can I have it?”
BFF (with severe RBF and super annoyed now): “I didn’t ask a question.”
WotMP (confusion on her face): “Yes you did. And the moderator said you should go up and get something. Can I have whatever you get?”
BFF (Murderface has now replaced RBF and she might punch this lady in the vagina): “I did not ask a question.” (mind you we are still walking at this point) followed quickly by me stating: “No she didn’t.”
WotMP (even more confused and adamant): “Yes you did!”
Me (now I am pissed and want to punch her in the throat and the vagina): “No she didn’t. And she never would. So go away.”
At this point we were able to walk away from WotMP and out of the room and looked at each other incredulously. First off, who the fuck are you to ask us if you can have whatever swag or photo or whatever was being given out for asking questions in a small panel? We don’t know you. Neither one of us asked a question. Not once. We might have drooled over Gareth but NEVER would we have asked a question. Secondly, don’t you think we are fans too? We would probably want whatever was being given to us for asking a question so why the fuck would we give it to you? Go away. We are not friends. And lastly…who the fuck do you think you are? Rude. Can you not tell we don’t like to people? OMG….you cannot sit with us. Period. Rude.
This is exactly why BFF and I don’t like to people at events. Unless we know you. Nope. Because of weird rude experiences like this one. Guess we need to practice our #murderfaces instead like someone else we know (BS girls you know who I am talking about!). Seriously we don’t like to people. Despite the WofMP, the day was not a waste because this happened and BFF’s smile says it all:
Oh yeah. I didn’t die today. I did however discover that there is a new level to the weird and rude people you can meet at events like Fanfest which almost made me punch someone in the throat and vagina but I didn’t die. I am Fat Girl working on my #murderface and meeting Ianto Running. The experiment continues…