Earlier this month, BFF and I returned to the Giant Nerdfest that is Phoenix Comicon to get our geek on and squee like the fangirls we are over different celebrities. We also might have shopped till we dropped (such great geek shopping there, no joke). Unfortunately for us, it also happened to be during a heat wave in what we have now termed the Devil’s Butthole. There was even a hot wind so it felt like you were walking in an oven. So not enjoyable. But luckily, we were inside for most of the time and did not have to deal with the heat too much. What we did have to deal with was the people. And not just any people…some of these people were the creepers of the world. The weird socially awkward types. You know what I mean. The kind of people who you usually shy away from in a social setting because they make you feel so uncomfortable. Or you try to run away from but don’t want to seem rude. BFF and I unfortunately had this experience this year at Comicon. One that made us feel like we needed a creep detector. It was not pleasant.
On the last day of Comicon, BFF and I decided the last minute to purchase a photo-op with one of the actresses from a BBC Doctor Who spin-off, Torchwood. This meant we had some time between the last panel we went to go see and the photo op, so we decided to get some food and find a table to sit down and shove it in our gobs. All the other days, we had left the convention to eat at some amazing pubs where we could consume some alcohol (which makes dealing with all the people at one of these events a lot easier) but seeing how we were driving home after our photo, we decided staying at the convention and eating there was easier. We got our food and saw some seats open at a large table, so we went and grabbed them. I sat next to this older guy and BFF had the luck of having the seat next to her empty. We proceeded to start to shovel food in our mouths when the guy next to me starts talking. I thought he was talking to someone else when all of a sudden I realized he was talking to me. About Star Wars action figures. Seriously Creeper Comicon Dude? You don’t even know me or even took the time to introduce yourself. Just started talking out of the blue to no one in particular but staring at me. Why me? I stopped mid bite to stare at this guy with what I am sure was either RBF or shock as he kept talking. About Star Wars action figures. How much is there to say about Star Wars action figures? Apparently a lot. After my initial shock wore off and BFF and I continued eating, I even turned slightly in my chair toward her, giving him my back. What would that say to you? Would it say keep talking or would you take that as a hint that I really did not give a care about your Star Wars action figures? He kept talking. Also, this guy was like 20 years my senior…no joke….rambling on and on about the action figures he couldn’t find at the convention. Um….hello….I am eating here. Go away. Do not speak to me Creeper.
At this point, as BFF and I continue to eat while making pointed eyes at each other, Creeper Comicon Dude (CCD as we shall now call him) pulls out his phone to actually show me exactly what he is talking about and how much he has seen these sets going for outside the convention. Now what am I supposed to do with this? I don’t want to seem rude, so I feign interest and nod while I hurriedly shove more food in my face because I want to leave as soon as possible. Wrong move on my part. CCD took this as that I was truly interested. Oh help me. He started going on and on about a certain set of Star Wars action figures that is rare and how nobody has it and he can’t believe nobody has it here in the vendor hall. I cannot eat any faster at this point. BFF is trying not to laugh next to me but she understood my need to escape. She saw the desperation in my eyes as I turned towards her silently signaling that I needed help and eats faster than I have ever seen her, frantically shoving nachos in her mouth. I almost burst into laughter at this point as she tried to shove like 10 nachos in her mouth at once so we could leave. The silent language between us is crazy sometimes. As I watch her put so many nachos in her mouth that she looks like a chipmunk, CCD starts to pull out the action figures he has purchased to show us and I quickly stand up. He continues to talk as I nod to say goodbye and say “Have a nice Con.” As BFF, who is still trying to fit as many nachos as she can into her mouth at once, and I walk away, he is still talking out loud about the action figures. I can’t make this stuff up.
BFF and I are now laughing and trying to decide in his own creeper way if he was trying to flirt with me as we get in line to get our picture taken with Eve Myles. I am not sure. I mean he was nice but so socially awkward that maybe he was trying to flirt. Or maybe he was just a talker and could not tell that I was not in the mood to people. Especially with a Creeper Comicon Dude. It is hard to tell. As we walked back through the hall to leave after our photo, CCD was still sitting at the table and waved at us as we walked by like he wanted us to come back over and sit with him. Nope. Hard pass.
Oh yeah. I didn’t die today. I did learn more about Star Wars action figures than I ever wanted to know but I didn’t die. I am Fat Girl who didn’t want to people with Creeper Comicon Dude but just wanted to eat in peace Running. The experiment continues…