When I was growing up, I lived in a small town in Iowa where everyone knew everyone else. Â You knew all your neighbors by first name and always watched out for each other. Â When someone moved into the neighborhood, I can guarantee you several of the neighbors brought over food to welcome the interloper like cookies, brownies, hot dish or pie. Â Mmmmmmmm….pie. Â I moved into my neighborhood over ten years ago and since having moved in, most of the houses around me have become rental properties. Â I once knew my neighbors because we all moved into the new area around the same time and because my ex was friendly. Â Being an introvert, meeting new people is not really my thing. Â I could really care less who my neighbors are unless they bug me like the driveway parking assholes or the garage band rejects. Â I have no need to be social. Â Why would I? Â I know you extroverts out there may find this hard to believe, but introverts really are quite comfortable in their own little bubble. Â For reals. Â It is BFF who makes me leave my house and do stuff.
One day, where she made me leave my little bubble and go on a shopping excursion with her, BFF and I returned to my house to work on a work project she had to finish. Â In other words, she needed my craft skills and my supplies in my craft dojo. Â Oh…and free labor. Â When we were finished, I helped her carry stuff to her car and was going to walk to my mailbox after saying goodbye. Â You will remember that we have those big mailboxes for everyone in the next three-mile radius it feel like. Â Ok…maybe just half my street and around the corner since I know SOTL Man gets his mail there as well. Â Yeah…I get the pleasure of him getting his mail right across from my house, probably scoping me out for his latest fat skin suit creation. Â Fun times. Â We get outside and right away I notice several of my neighbors have also stopped to get their mail. Â I inwardly cringe, knowing that at least one of them will want to stop and talk to me and I will have to be friendly and not have Resting Bitch Face (this is something I excel at, trust me. Â I don’t mean to, but somehow BFF and I manage to have it quite a bit). Â It’s a real thing. Â You can look it up and I bet you will see my picture. Â I let out a big sigh, causing BFF to look at me questioningly and then one of our conversations happened.
Me (with apparent Resting Bitch Face):  “I guess I will wait to get my mail.”
BFF (now noticing others are at the mailboxes talking to each other and being all neighborly): “Why? Â You don’t like those neighbors?”
Me (noticeably disgusted by the thought of having to actually have a neighborly conversation): Â “That one on the left is annoying and weird and lives over across the street. Â She totally bugs me. Â The other one is a weirder guy who lives around the corner and is friendly with SOTL Man. Â There are too many weird people here who want to like talk to me and stuff. Â I really don’t like my neighborhood.”
BFF (with a slight knowingly smile on her face): Â “You don’t like your neighborhood or your neighbors?”
Me (thinks for a moment): Â “Well…ok my neighbors.”
BFF (laughing): Â “So what you are saying is you don’t like people.”
Me (now laughing a little): Â “Yeah. Â Basically. Â I don’t like people”
I adore her. Â So glad she gets me. Â Oh and by the way, by the time this conversation was over, the neighbors had left the mailboxes and I was able to go get my mail in peace. Thanks BFF!
Oh yeah…I didn’t die today. Â I did avoid being neighborly and discover I just don’t like people, but I didn’t die. Â I am Fat Girl who is not a friendly neighbor with Resting Bitch Face Running. Â The experiment continues…
This made me laugh in agreement😄