Victoria’s Secret Can SUCK IT!

I am sure I have divulged the information that I have had a breast reduction before on this blog, but in case you didn’t know….yup.  I had plastic surgery and am PROUD of it.  Best thing I ever did for myself was to go from a 44 F to a 40 C. Can you say holy big tatas Batman?  After having said surgery, I was so excited to finally be able to shop at Victoria’s Secret and get cute pretty bras.  I mean. Let’s be real.  There is nothing pretty about the yardage it takes to make a fat girl bra nor the width of the straps or the amount of hooks it takes to close the damn thing. It really looks like a torture contraption.  I mean my boobs were so big, you could wear my bra on your head.  You think I am kidding?  Take a gander for yourself:

Me with my own bra on my head. Pretty sure you can see my ginormous tatas here as well!

Yup.  So you can see that I was very excited to buy cute pretty bras!  So, after surgery, once I was able to, I went bra shopping and actually got measured because I had absolutely no idea what size I was.  BFF and I went in and asked the VS gal to measure me.  I was nervous and went into  the dressing room for the first time.  It was like being asked back into a secret club that as a fat girl with huge tatas I was never admitted entry to before.  I told the gal that I had recently had a reduction, which she mistook for implants and asked me what size I went to.  I told her that my doc had said I would be a C and she looked puzzled and actually said “Why wouldn’t you go bigger?”  I laughed and explained that I had the girls taken down in size and she just could not fathom why I would do that at all and kept giving me weird looks.  But, after measuring me, I was for sure a 40 C and she helped me fit into cute sexy bras that I had always dreamed of since I got boobs in the 4th grade.  For several years, I have enjoyed shopping for bras in VS and even have a charge card like a full-fledged member of the cute boobie club.  Having lost some weight, I also have been able to wear their underwear which also makes me feel as pretty and sexy as a fat girl can.  Needless to say, my charge card was quickly upgraded to a black one.  Yippee!

Now, just recently, I went in to get some new bras and undies and could not find my size in either one ANYWHERE in the store.  Finally, I asked about my size and was told that VS would no longer carry the bigger sizes in the store.  They would only carry them online because they don’t want to sell the big sizes in the store.  WTF?  Are those sizes offensive?  Is it too much to ask for VS to carry an XL in their undies or a 40 in a bra?  Are those sizes not the standard because they want to perpetuate the crack whore image of an XS as what women should be in underwear? And I really don’t feel that an XL or a 40 C are BIG sizes to begin with for goodness sake.  Well, VS, I have one thing to say…YOU CAN SUCK IT.  Thanks for making me feel like a fat girl excluded from the club once again.  It’s bad enough that you parade skinny little things down the runway in your cute undies and that none of your lingerie would even begin to cover my thigh, but to tease me with the promise of cute panties and bras in finally my size is just plain wrong.  And to perpetuate the tease with your free panties and angel rewards cards is just too much. It was a crushing fat girl moment.  Fat girls just want cute underthings too.  We don’t all like or need to wear the industrial bras to keep our boobies in place and feel humiliated that we cannot just for once walk into a normal store, not a fat girl store, and walk out with cute underthings.  It’s like that crushing humiliating moment, when as a fat little girl, you get picked last for teams in gym class.  Ever experienced that VS?  Crushing I tell you.

Now, excuse me while I go online and order my cute underthings from, yes, VS.  What can I say?  They are still cute and comfy. I will just hang my fat girl head in shame as I purchase my unsavory sizes of XL and 40 C.  Suck it Victoria’s Secret…suck it.

Oh yeah.  I didn’t die today.  I did feel like a fat girl picked last for gym class but I didn’t die.  I am fat girl shamefully still shopping from VS even though my size is BIG running.  The experiment continues….

19 thoughts on “Victoria’s Secret Can SUCK IT!

  1. Drink2that April 17, 2012 / 3:57 pm

    Chin up girl. VS can suck it and I’m sure you won’t be the first or last lifeftime customer they have lost for that bonehead move.

    • ladymiryaa April 17, 2012 / 3:58 pm

      Thanks! Pretty sure XL is not a BIG size in my world. Nor is a 40 C! Grrrrrrrrrrr

  2. Merilee April 17, 2012 / 4:01 pm

    I went into a VS in downtown Kansas City with a pregnant friend a few months back. Neither of us had ever been measured..and after we were, and informed there was nothing in the store to accommodate either of us (she’s normally a fatty, too) we did the walk of shame out. Unbelievable!

    • ladymiryaa April 18, 2012 / 9:05 am

      Right? Ugh…stupid VS

  3. Beth April 17, 2012 / 4:30 pm

    I recently had a breast reduction also. While I was in pre-surgery getting my lines drawn in the keyhole shape, the girl in the next room was talking about her new DDs !!! What- was she crazy ? I was going from a DD to a C….

    I recently started wearing underwire bras again… from Wal Mart. They are just as cute and 1/3 the price.
    Victoria Secret is nice but not practical for a working woman…

    Don’t worry, who cares about Victoria Secret…you’ve got good friends who can lift you up

    • ladymiryaa April 17, 2012 / 4:32 pm

      When I was getting my lines drawn on, the surgeon put two dots way high up and I asked what that was. He said that was where my nipples were gonna go. My reply was “Way up there?” He looked at me and deadpanned said “That is where they are SUPPOSED to be Kristann.” oh……

      • Beth April 17, 2012 / 8:17 pm

        Omg yes !! That was the best part : )

        I remember watching a VS commercial and saying … I want to look like that
        My husband said ” ha ! You’ll never look like that ”
        I said wryly , with enough money I can look like anything I want …

  4. Jen April 17, 2012 / 5:06 pm

    Same issue backward for me. 32 A-yup I have the tits of a 5 yr old and I HATE it. If I had the money I would get them a tad bigger lol! So I have no trouble buying XS panties but I am always directed to the training bra section for my bras. VS can suck it girl! Even skinny girls have walks of shame.

    • ladymiryaa April 18, 2012 / 9:07 am

      My BFF says she is a 34 flat…lol. Little boobies can also have the same issues. And what is with the phrase “training bra”? What are we training them for?

  5. Micol Schallon Ritter April 17, 2012 / 6:49 pm

    I reached a 32D my freshman year in HS, probably before VS existed, and was a 32DD while we were at Cottey. I have now reached my present glory of 36G (yes, that’s right, G. As in Good God they’re Gigantic). VS has never fit me. I had saved about $3K toward a reduction when I found out my husband used it to pay off a credit card. grrrr. He likes them the way they are. I WILL have a reduction some day. In the meantime, you’ll know me on the street as the hunchback woman whose windsocks are flapping in the breeze…

    • ladymiryaa April 17, 2012 / 9:39 pm

      Oh Alex….how I love you my Senior!

  6. funnyortragic April 17, 2012 / 11:15 pm

    Forget that, man. I woulda just given them the mental finger and gone elsewhere. Which is what I regularly do, because holy batman, who needs to pay 70 dollars for ONE bra? One bra that doesn’t even have back slimming. One bra that for some ungodly reason, they try to sell me as a push up bra. If I’m a larger girl, I don’t WANT an extra cup size! (head at knees, breathing in through a paper bag…)

    • ladymiryaa April 18, 2012 / 9:02 am

      No kidding! Who wants a larger cup size when I just had them reduced for goodness sake!

  7. Shannon Warwick Pisciotti April 18, 2012 / 6:52 am

    Or even better… how about when after years of shopping at VS, they suddenly “redesign” your favorite bras to not fit you anymore!

    • ladymiryaa April 18, 2012 / 9:03 am

      Yeah or quit carrying the one you love to wear. WTF?

  8. joanmamo April 19, 2012 / 1:33 pm

    several times when I went into VS they gave me a wired look when i stated I hate push up bras, I worked hard to gets the girls to get smaller size. Finally down to a DD.So tired of all the comments from people if my cleavage shows. I just want to wear a dress or shirt people.
    Good Lord. Not to mention how wriggly they are from nursing for 4 years.

    • ladymiryaa April 19, 2012 / 10:17 pm

      God I hate it when people comment on cleavage and I am so self aware of it, especially when we are at work! Bleh!

  9. La La April 19, 2012 / 10:26 pm

    I agree, sister, they can suck it. I had a breast reduction, too! I still can’t feel my nips after 4 years, but it was worth it. Let’s be large boobed, previously massively boobed friends!!

    I was 38FF and now D. The fat chick in me chooses Nordstrom these days over VS as they are forgiving..yet expensive. Seriously, VS, suck it.

    • ladymiryaa April 19, 2012 / 10:29 pm

      Oh I am pretty we are long lost friends!! Breast reductions are the bomb!

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