I am sure I have divulged the information that I have had a breast reduction before on this blog, but in case you didn’t know….yup. I had plastic surgery and am PROUD of it. Best thing I ever did for myself was to go from a 44 F to a 40 C. Can you say holy big tatas Batman? After having said surgery, I was so excited to finally be able to shop at Victoria’s Secret and get cute pretty bras. I mean. Let’s be real. There is nothing pretty about the yardage it takes to make a fat girl bra nor the width of the straps or the amount of hooks it takes to close the damn thing. It really looks like a torture contraption. I mean my boobs were so big, you could wear my bra on your head. You think I am kidding? Take a gander for yourself:
Yup. So you can see that I was very excited to buy cute pretty bras! So, after surgery, once I was able to, I went bra shopping and actually got measured because I had absolutely no idea what size I was. BFF and I went in and asked the VS gal to measure me. I was nervous and went into the dressing room for the first time. It was like being asked back into a secret club that as a fat girl with huge tatas I was never admitted entry to before. I told the gal that I had recently had a reduction, which she mistook for implants and asked me what size I went to. I told her that my doc had said I would be a C and she looked puzzled and actually said “Why wouldn’t you go bigger?” I laughed and explained that I had the girls taken down in size and she just could not fathom why I would do that at all and kept giving me weird looks. But, after measuring me, I was for sure a 40 C and she helped me fit into cute sexy bras that I had always dreamed of since I got boobs in the 4th grade. For several years, I have enjoyed shopping for bras in VS and even have a charge card like a full-fledged member of the cute boobie club. Having lost some weight, I also have been able to wear their underwear which also makes me feel as pretty and sexy as a fat girl can. Needless to say, my charge card was quickly upgraded to a black one. Yippee!
Now, just recently, I went in to get some new bras and undies and could not find my size in either one ANYWHERE in the store. Finally, I asked about my size and was told that VS would no longer carry the bigger sizes in the store. They would only carry them online because they don’t want to sell the big sizes in the store. WTF? Are those sizes offensive? Is it too much to ask for VS to carry an XL in their undies or a 40 in a bra? Are those sizes not the standard because they want to perpetuate the crack whore image of an XS as what women should be in underwear? And I really don’t feel that an XL or a 40 C are BIG sizes to begin with for goodness sake. Well, VS, I have one thing to say…YOU CAN SUCK IT. Thanks for making me feel like a fat girl excluded from the club once again. It’s bad enough that you parade skinny little things down the runway in your cute undies and that none of your lingerie would even begin to cover my thigh, but to tease me with the promise of cute panties and bras in finally my size is just plain wrong. And to perpetuate the tease with your free panties and angel rewards cards is just too much. It was a crushing fat girl moment. Fat girls just want cute underthings too. We don’t all like or need to wear the industrial bras to keep our boobies in place and feel humiliated that we cannot just for once walk into a normal store, not a fat girl store, and walk out with cute underthings. It’s like that crushing humiliating moment, when as a fat little girl, you get picked last for teams in gym class. Ever experienced that VS? Crushing I tell you.
Now, excuse me while I go online and order my cute underthings from, yes, VS. What can I say? They are still cute and comfy. I will just hang my fat girl head in shame as I purchase my unsavory sizes of XL and 40 C. Suck it Victoria’s Secret…suck it.
Oh yeah. I didn’t die today. I did feel like a fat girl picked last for gym class but I didn’t die. I am fat girl shamefully still shopping from VS even though my size is BIG running. The experiment continues….