Why I Hate The Plow Guy


So overnight we managed to get our first snowfall of the year.  Sigh. Really?  I wasn’t quite ready for it but it is here.  So I get up and bundle up because in order for me to get anywhere today it required me to shovel.  I do own a snowblower but really, two inches is nothing so I decided to get my exercise today by shoveling.  It really is hard work and you can work up quite the sweat doing it.  My drive is kinda long and curvy so I knew I would get a  fairly good sweat going on for a fat girl.  So out I went.  About ten minutes into shoveling the dive, I realized how much I actually hate shoveling snow.  I mean HATE.  It is the most tedious jobs but one that has to be done out of necessity.  It’s not like you can always plow your 4 wheel drive through it to get out.  Plus, sometimes when you do that, you leave these little ruts in the snow that then when it becomes dark, decide to freeze over and it is a death trap trying to get out of the driveway.  Not as much of a deathtrap as my side yard used to get before I had gutters put on the house.  My brother and I would go out there to get my recycle or garbage bin and practically fall to our deaths on the sheet of ice that got created back there.  Damn north side of the house.  It was like a badly performing Disney On Ice show back there trying to get the bins out.  I could just see one of us falling to our butts and breaking something in the process all because it was trash day.  Good thing I moved those bins to inside my garage.  Now that I live by myself, I could see me becoming a fat popsicle back there if I fell and not able to get up.  SOTL man might come by and rescue me, but he would really just wanna put me in his hole in the basement to warm up my skin some more so he could sew his suit out of it.

Twenty minutes into shoveling and working up a good sweat, I really decided that this snow thing was super overrated.  I was quite done but not with the drive.  And screw the city and their you must shovel your sidewalks ordinance.  Seriously?  I will shovel my sidewalks when you learn how to plow the streets.  I did have some tree branches come down from my poplar trees at the end of the drive so I had to stop shoveling and drag those over to where I hope someday the bulky pick up people come.  I swear I have had a pile of branches from trimming the annoying tree on my neighbor’s yard on my sidewalk forever.  Yeah that’s right.  I trimmed their damn tree that blocked me from seeing out of my drive.  Yeah I only trimmed it back to the sidewalk so only half of it is gone.  What?  It was in my way and they weren’t gonna do anything about it.  So sue me.  I took it upon myself to get out my saw and cut that damn tree back.  There.  I admit it.  Not like you couldn’t tell it was me since the evidence is still sitting in front of my house.  Shoot.  Was really hoping they would pick that up the next day so no one would know.  Since I don’t have irate neighbors at my doorstep, I think it’s safe to say they haven’t noticed since the view of the tree from their yard is still full.  So I finish my drive and there I am standing with shovel in hand,smiling and sweating because it is done and what happens next can only be described as karma….maybe for that tree.  I hear the sounds of the snow plow coming down the street and as I stand there triumphant over shoveling, I watch as the plow guy goes by and makes a burum in front of the drive I had just shoveled out.  He actually took the time to wave to me as well.  Fucker.  I hate the city plow guy.

For now, the drive is shoveled and more snow can fall because I am pretty sure the couch is about to take control.  I leave you with yet another reminder about checking your boobies….why? Because it also serves as a reminder that I will be working the 3 Day Walk all next weekend (still taking donations by the way at  http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/2011/ArizonaEvent2011?px=2936564&pg=personal&fr_id=1600  Nice shameless plug to try to get some money from ya!)

Oh yeah.  I didn’t die today.  Despite my best efforts, I didn’t die.  I am fat girl who hates the plow guy running.  The experiment continues….

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