Beep Beep! Move it! Fat Girl Coming Through!

Ugh. Ouch. Ouch. F***! I believe is what my body said today on day five of this experiment.  There was one thing I did not count on….my body not cooperating.  Today it was my knees.  For those of you who don’t know, I had a meniscus tear a couple of years back and have to have it partially removed in my right knee (try going through Disneyland in a wheelchair and a big knee brace on….it’s quite the experience.).  Both knees were complaining loudly today which sometimes they do.  I admit it…I am fat and older.  Both of these play havoc on your body and today was no exception.  Of course my best friend Diann did happen to say to me “Why didn’t you wear your knee brace?” Duh.  I have a brace.  I am so pretty.  Guess I will have to give that a try tomorrow.  Here is another thing I forgot to consider when starting this experiment.  Work.  You see, I am a vampire.  Not the blood sucking, sparkly skin, glamour you with my eyes vampire (although that would be pretty cool), but I work nights as a nurse.  12 hour nights to be precise.  I forgot to figure in how this whole thing would work once I started back to work, which of course is tonight. Hmmmm.  Today was easy.  I normally get up for a bit on my first day on and then lay down to take a nap.  So, I got up and forced my screaming, cussing at me knees out onto the pavement.  They simmered down to a dull roar with an occasional grumble by the end of the walk and then I started to run.  Wow.  That did not feel good today and I felt like my legs were made of concrete.  Pretty sure the old guy in the motorized wheelchair on the streets was going faster than me.  He was mocking me…challenging me to a running duel.  I let him win, considering he is old and in a wheelchair.  I will challenge him another day. I didn’t wanna hurt his feelings by smoking him as I ran past.   At least the neighborhood was quieter today (although I still kept a look out for the creepy Silence of the Lambs guy.  Still not convinced he doesn’t wanna make a suit out of my skin.  I KNEW there was a reason I don’t get involved with my neighbors!) so they didn’t have to witness my oh so slower than slow attempt at running today.  But still, I did it.  Today was definitely one of those days where getting to the next driveway or next recycling bin was an accomplishment.  And of course I had to run into a fellow jogger…you know the type.  Young, skinny, wearing nothing but her sports bra and shorty shorts.  Pretty sure I would scare somebody if I tried that or end up in one of those People of Wal-Mart pictures you see.  Nobody wants to see me in just my sports bra and some shorty shorts.  Especially me.  Hell, I don’t even like to look at myself naked let alone in an outfit that would just showcase my fat rolls and jiggly belly.  Cuz that is so hot.  But then as we passed each other, she gave me a thumbs up and a big smile. What?  A thumbs up?  For the fat girl running?  Huh.

This leads me to my other thought for the day.  Inspiration.  That thumbs up and smile while probably meant nothing to her meant the world to me.  Inspiration can come in many forms.  That one today inspired me to push past the challenges my body was giving me and run a little further today.  So thanks, skinny little b***** with your sports bra and figure I would kill for, thanks for the thumbs up.  A lot of my friends and readers have said I have inspired them to start running….really?  Me? Inspirational?  Nah!  How would anyone find me inspirational?  Seriously. I am your average fat girl who tells it like I see it.  That’s all.  It’s a new thing to think of myself as inspirational. I might suddenly sprout a halo and wings and write a self-help book.  That would be weird.  The self-help book not the halo and wings part.  Wings would be rather cool cuz then I could be like Maximum Ride….but that is another subject all together.  But if I have inspired you to try running, then I applaud you!  It’s not easy as a fat girl to get out there. (Remember the tips…LONG shorts!)  We can start our own club.  The fat girls running club (or sometimes barely moving while gasping like a fish club).  The point is we are out there…trying.  Maybe tomorrow I can run past old guy in the motorized wheelchair and yell “Beep Beep!  Move it!  Fat girl coming through!” as I run past him. That would be made of awesome sauce.  Pretty sure.

Oh.  And I didn’t die again today.  The experiment continues….

One thought on “Beep Beep! Move it! Fat Girl Coming Through!

  1. Wendy Albert Bianco August 29, 2011 / 1:54 pm

    Hey you were inspirational when you trained to walk 60 miles in 3 day mostly by yourself. I had a hard enpugh time doing it when opther people were waiting on my fat a**. In fact the thought of you on training walks by yourself got me out of bed many a morning at 4am. You got this Cupcake! Love ya!

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